For nearly a year, a chair has sat empty around our family's dinner table. On November 18, 2017, upon arriving back from China, Jonas Timothy Huangyi McCulloch, found his place at our table and in our family's hearts. Life in its vigorous, unrelenting way has been moving "full-speed ahead" since we've arrived home last November. Jonas immediately "experienced" his first American Thanksgiving with over forty McCulloch and Varty family members. (If you haven't seen Jonas' Homecoming video, you can see that beautiful day and moments from his FIRST Thanksgiving and other "firsts" here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZwGTizKs-E) On Thanksgiving, Jonas even took to the street with his uncles and cousins and played a little light football. As you all know, once you hit Thanksgiving the next four weeks of Christmas events are an avalanche of family parties, shopping, wrapping, watching Christmas movies, Holiday band and choir concerts. Jonas decorated his first Christmas tree. After surviving both the process of finding and cutting down a Christmas tree, along with our decision to do family pictures at the tree farm, we placed our slightly-crooked, "this tree looks like a distant cousin to the Charlie Brown Christmas tree" up and to a bewildered Jonas we hung lights and ornaments. As each of our kids placed up ornaments that dated back to their first years of life through now, Jonas had only a few of his own newly-bought ornaments to place in the tree. Our kids "shared" their ornaments with him so he had more to hang, but at one moment Jonas left our family room and was busy gathering paper and pencils and crayons. While we continued to add ornaments to our tree, Jonas continued to work on his OWN ornament, his OWN masterpiece. When he was done, he timidly presented his work, a collage that captured elements of the holiday season, drawings of each of us and our pets, and across the middle these words: "I LOVE MY Family". There could be no greater gift that holiday season. Jonas felt loved, accepted and a part of HIS family. Through Christmas morning and New Years, into celebrations of Chinese New Year and the Super Bowl, each of us in our family have come to realize one truth: As much a "gift" our family may be to Jonas, He is MORE a GIFT, a BLESSING to US. Jonas, through the awe and wonder in his eyes at the simplest of things, singing "Happy Birthday" or receiving a gift from someone, has shown all of us in our family to LOOK and SEE the blessings around us. Just the other morning, as we drove to school, Jonas excitedly pointed up to the sky, shouting, "Look Dad!! Look!!". As I squinted up through our front windshield, I saw the white tracks of a plane ascending far in the distance. Jonas remembered his first plane ride and being up in the air like that plane he spotted that morning. As Jonas has shared of the hardships and sad (and happy) moments of his life in China, the joy he exhibits and the pure, selfless love he carries in the BIG smile puts my often, miserable, selfish heart to shame. Jonas certainly endured many sad moments in his life. And while some would be tempted to say, "look how your family SAVED him." Nope. It is Jonas who has saved us, especially me, in my lack of gratitude, from the moments where I feel that life is so "miserable." His joy and laughter have uncovered the many elements in life that I have neglected to be joyful about. There has been much to celebrate and be joyful about as our family has grown to a family of seven. And if you follow Amber and my Facebook posts or Instagram pics, you hopefully can see that joy, our MORE open eyes to SEE the blessings we have in EACH other. This is not to say that life around our table, within the rooms of our house, play off each day as PERFECTION. When asked how life is at home with five kids and seven people, our answer has become "we are in transition." Amber and I are imperfect parents. Our kids, including Jonas, are typical....KIDS! There have been arguments, moments of jealousy, fights over who had the computer or television first. As Jonas adjust to learning a WHOLE new language, we have pretty much shoved him into church events, movie outings, being a part of family movie night. We took him to the movies a little over week after arriving in America, for crying out lout. (We know he at least enjoyed the buttered popcorn and recliners even if he didn't understand a WORD of the movie.) There have been tears and bitter moments as siblings adjust to a new brother that has been added immediately to the mix since last November. As with all siblings, there have been fights. Mix in Jonas' hemophilia and the need to give him one-on-one instruction to learn how to read and speak in English (which Amber has solely taken on ALL BY HERSELF) and there are nights where Amber and I feel a bit exhausted and overwhelmed. Our newly, remodeled family certainly requires MUCH prayer, MUCH dependence on God. We are a work in progress, trying to make sure EACH of our five children feel loved and special. But you know what? Those tough and challenging moments, which arrive DAILY, pale in comparison to the joy and blessing we are all discovering as we continue to adjust to being a family of six to a family of seven. We are reminded with each new challenge, each fight, each tear that falls that WE all LOVE and NEED each other. We are reaffirmed in our belief in the utter importance of FAMILY, and not family defined by BLOOD but by the bond of love we have for each other. So a once empty chair is now filled around our table. Our home is a "bit" more full. But God, knowing WHO and WHAT our family needed, has brought Jonas and a whole TON of realizations and moments of growth to us. Jonas is EXACTLY what our home and OUR HEARTS needed. Our family is a "work in progress", and the view around our table is nothing short of a masterpiece.
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"Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the EAST and gather you from the west" Archives
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